Lana Vaughan

The Queen of Questions

Before you go

collegeBoundOver the past month friends have been dropping their freshmen college students off at various campuses around the country. Many of these friends are people I’ve met during the past three years at my favorite teen’s high school. Their students, for the most part, were in the music program or color guard.

Next week the online application process begins for the Fall of 2016 admissions. That will be my turn to load up the van, drop my precious students off and drive away with tears streaming down my face.

Just one short year to teach her all the things she needs to know. We’ve spent the last 15 teaching her how to be a “good kid”, a “good friend”, a “good student”. But as I’m sorting laundry this morning I realize there is so much I haven’t taught her about how to be an adult. So I am setting up a lesson plan “Things To Teach  Her Before She Goes”.

Personal Care
When do you have routine medical check ups?
What vaccinations has she had? Tetanus?
What childhood illness? (She remembers being sick a few times but does she know if she had chicken pox?)
How to find a good dentist
How to see what her medical insurance covers
What to keep stocked in the medicine cabinet

How to open a checking account
How to balance a checking account
How to and when to use credit
How to file taxes
Debt, good and bad

How/why you sort laundry
How to cook basic meals
How to shop for value not just price
Cleaning tips and shortcuts
How to make good coffee
How to make family recipes

Mental, Emotional, Spiritual
How to make time for herself matter
How to set personal goals
How to listen to her heart and body
How nurture her spirit

Safety (How major is this to a parent’s heart)
Being aware of her surroundings
Keeping vigilant without being paranoid
Learning who is trustworthy
Knowing how to change a tire
Knowing when to call the police
Knowing how to defend herself

I heard a definition of responsibility years ago that took some of the dread out of it. Responsibility is the ability to respond in a situationally appropriate manner.

I want my young adult to be confident that she has the ability to respond.
That she has the confidence in herself, her skills and her knowledge to face whatever life brings her way.
That she has the heart and the courage to go after the dreams, goals and values she has determined are important to her unique journey.

Then knowing she is prepared, I will let the tears flow freely when it’s time for her to take what I’ve taught her and let her join the other adults in college.

What do you feel was missing in your “How to be an Adult” training?
What do you wish someone had taught you?
What do you still wish you had learned?
Are you responsible?

About Lana


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